Quarantine Journals - Bad day

Today was a hell of a day. It started out OK, almost good evening, when both of the kids slept in. I felt optimistic that we were going to have a good balance days and say those gotten a lot of sleep. But, everything went off the rails pretty quickly. Penni had her lunch Bunch zoom with her classmates, and Oliver had a brief chat with Aurora. Penny seem to have so much fun talking with our teacher and her friends, showing them everything that she had been doing here, and then running to her iPad to upload pictures so they could go see them on Seesaw. 

After the chat, I thought it would be nice to get outside before the big storms hit. So we all went for a walk, but Oliver was really just not having any kind of direction. He wanted to walk to the school. He keeps saying he wants to find his parents. He wasn't listening to anything I said. Penny didn't really want to go for a walk to begin with, but because I had to walk with him, she came with us and she brought her bug net. I didn't have the forethought to go grab one for all of her, so halfway through the walk they started fighting over it. I ended up basically redirecting us towards the house and having everybody go inside. 

She wanted to get started on her schoolwork, but I wanted to get them lunch fed so we could get to naptime because Oliver was clearly exhausted. She got mad because I wouldn't let her get our iPad, and then was fussing at me for all of lunch. Oliver was yelling about one thing or another and wanting a snack or wanting to eat this or that for most of lunch.  He kept climbing down from his chair and wandering off, which was fine when he was distracted, I guess. But at this point everyone was so frustrated, but it was impossible to come down. Penny kept snapping at me, climbing under the table and saying angry things, and I kept snapping at her because I was tired of being the punching bag for everybody's emotions. I'm sure the fact that I'm on my period and feel miserable wasn't helping, but I think today was just a combination of being locked down for this long. I'm sure part of it was seeing all of her friends online, and then having to go back to distance-learning.

I tried for an extended period of time to get Oliver to take a nap, but he wasn't having any of it. So I gave up, and brought him out, but then he was having a total meltdown because she thought that he was going to sleep, and she wanted to play video games, and she was just ready for a fight all day. Oliver was screaming about wanting his iPad because he saw her finishing up her schoolwork, and it just kept going downhill. Eventually, Richard came in and skipped both of them up and said OK we're going on a bike ride. He put them in the bike trailer and rode over to duck Pond Park and back to the house. He said everything went pretty well until they were rounding the corner to come home, and when he mentioned how they started fighting in the bike trailer. It was really hot, and he rode really hard, and so they all came and exhausted and grumpy. Penni still wanted to go run around because she didn't exert any energy in the bike trailer, so I ended up back in the front yard with the both of them while I play on the scooters around back-and-forth. Oliver kept trying to take us on a walk, but I told him we weren't doing that again. I brought them out Popsicles to eat, but then he didn't like hers. I'm going to have us come in so that I could get dinner started.

Around dinner time I feel like something turned around. Penny didn't fight us over the mail, we did some jokes back-and-forth, And afterwords she got to do her Earth Day party which seem to fill some buckets. She put up some decorations, and perhaps some choices for us to participate in the party. So we had a ball fight, and a little dance party, and then I played some video games with her before bed. She seem to be in a much better place by the end of the day, but Oliver was insane because he hadn't taken a nap, and he didn't want to go to sleep. 

I got him to sleep pretty quickly once I can actually get him into the bed, but every time he goes to bed early he never stays asleep. After waking up a couple of times, and totally freaking out when Richard tried to get him to sleep, I ended up bringing him back to my bed and sleeping with him for the first time since the night went. This is literally the first night that he said that he wanted me since then. He has woken up about three times, but each time he's gone back to sleep without even asking for milk, so I think he gets the drill. But I feel a little anxious about the idea of losing the only alone time that I have, which is after he goes to bed. Taking it one day at a time, telling myself not to make a big deal out of it. I laid in bed and watch several more episodes of shits creek, which is just at this point so sweet and delightful and helpful and makes you feel good about humanity even though it's fictional. Let's be honest, the reality out there right now is just shit.

States are trying to open back up, some of them even pretending that everything is fine even though their cases are on the rise. The federal government is actually saying that it can press charges against governor's who are keeping their social distancing mandates going. The city of Coppell is throwing a parade next Thursday, encouraging people to park up and down a busy road, and asking them to buy food from local eateries but not actually get out of their car in mind all social distancing requirements. It's just asking for trouble, because of all of this is Thomas anything, it's that people don't listen or do what they're supposed to do. So I'll pass.

It's weird to have us all in the same bedroom again. But also kind of sweet.

Did I mention that Penny

's front tooth, the one that was holding out, fell out yesterday? It came out in the evening, and she was quick to run in and put it in her tooth fairy pillow. She has no front teeth now, I think she's feeling a little self-conscious about it because every time she zooms with someone they mention it.

Here's hoping tomorrow is a better day. I'm feeling pretty worn out and exhausted, no plans for keeping them busy, entertain, or making the day feel special. At this point I feel like I'm just dragging myself to the finish line, but where is the finish line? Richard will go to work on Saturday, and I guess we'll try to squeeze it An entire weekend of fun and a Sunday. And then Monday I'll be talking about how burned out I am and how I still need a break. Fingers crossed that one comes along, because I spent their entire back bike ride today opening packages, sanitizing the contents, and cleaning up Mosley's poop in the living room.

PS, here's a couple of pictures from yesterday, and a picture that my friend sent me. Her husband ordered curbside pick up from Lowe's again, but I guess he did the wrong location. So she had to run across town, I got there at 2:15, and this location has a sign out front saying that curbside pick up ends at two. She had to go inside, and this guy was standing next to her, less than 6 feet away.