Quarantine Journals - Rough Day

I can't say that today was a good day. I woke up to the kids bickering and I was already done. I was done before I went to bed last night. It's just a lot of fighting and unrest, and I'm exhausted emotionally spent before we even start the day. So, I don't let's go outside, package them up and got them on the back porch. From the get go it was the wrong everything.  I took them in the backyard so that maybe I could do some gardening and reset my mind, but Penny didn't want to go in the backyard. I told them they could get muddy and they could play in the sand, and they seemed happy for about 45 minutes or so, and then Penny was done. She didn't want to be in the backyard anymore, and she asked me about half a dozen times to take her to the front yard.  Oliver was getting Reggie about everything, and I finally just said let's go inside. So I brought them inside and got them in the bathtub, but it was practically falling apart in the kitchen. I still had 1 million things I needed to do before he went down for his nap, and it felt like I couldn't actually get any of them done. The kids were screaming at each other in the bathtub, and Oliver was throwing and hitting, and it was just one conflict after another. It's exhausting playing the mediator 24 hours a day.

I got them eating lunch, and then afterwards they got into their little play routine. I was trying to tidy up the kitchen and get a couple of things done, but I swear Penny came in to ask me if I was going to take Oliver for a nap about 16 times in 20 minutes. And I was just frustrated! I'm just exhausted by this routine right now. I don't have the energy or the time to set up new activities anymore, and the kids are bored and they can't get along with each other because they're tired of doing the same things over and over again. I can't hardly blame them!

After his nap, we released some ladybugs outside again, and then we came inside and let a few go on my Mint in here which is also covered in aphids for some reason. Then Penny and I went outside and filled up a new bucket to use as my rain barrel while Oliver colored and played with Legos in the study. Richard made dinner, and we all watched some more of the Mandalorian while we ate.

Both of them are in bed now, and I was going to try to get out some new toys for them and rotate out the old ones, but then I rolled my ankle on a stack of magnets that I had already tripped over once. I tripped over them and Oliver yelled at me for messing up his magnets and then stack them back and I rolled my ankle and fell. Earlier, my dad sent me an email to let me know that when I texted him, he had to get up to get his phone and he got off-balance and spilled his drink everywhere and then had to get the vacuum and tripped over the cord and ended up scanning his leg and messing up his foot. So today was just garbage. There's no way around it. I hope tomorrow is better, but I don't know how it will be? Without some kind of plan. Without some kind of activity. Without something new, I'm afraid we just wake up and do the exact same damn thing over again. We all need a break. Penny needs a break to play with her friends, and even Oliver was asking to see his friends again today. They both need a break and scenery and toys, and I need a break from the kids, and I'm sure Richard needs a break from all of it.