Quarantine Journals - 4th of July at Grandpa’s House

I haven't written in a few days because we were out at my dad's house. We went out there Friday morning. But we forgot the diaper bag so we had to turn around and drive back here. It probably added about 45 minutes to our round trip. We got there around lunchtime, and my dad had fixed some grilled chicken. 

I'm using a new app to try and transcribe this I'm not entirely sure how to use all of it so I apologize for any weird grammar or spelling errors that are happening here. I'm really tired and I just don't want to type it up, but I do want to document it. 

So, Friday, we took the kids out and let them swim in the pool. A couple of times and Richard took Oliver for his nap. So, my dad and I and Penny could play board games we played uno, and a Super Mario card game that she has and labyrinth. Until Oliver woke up. And then we all had a snack, and we took them out to the pool. Oliver was nervous about falling in the pool again but he did a great job, and by the time we left he was doing a lot better in terms of being brave enough to get into the pool a bit more. We mostly spent the entire time with him kind of launching through the water at me. And then I would catch him, and keep him from going under 90% of the time. And then we would walk or he would kick, em, and practice swimming, to the other side of the pool and then keep going.

After our second swim, We came inside and Richard may be fajitas and we watched spies in disguise, which I think my dad really enjoyed the kids ended up staying up late to finish the movie, even though I felt like it was probably going to be a disaster. Penny was incapable of sleeping late the next day so she woke up, exhausted and super emotional. I guess she had planned on going swimming in the morning and I hadn't realized that that was really what everyone was wanting to do when I woke up and got excited about going for a drive around the square to see the protests that was happening. Richard really wanted to go see it too. But my dad was concerned about us going. And he tried to convince us to not go multiple times. He was worried that we might get stuck in traffic around the square where the protests was happening or someone might do something. I suggested that he come with us so that he could see that it was pretty small, but there were people out there, and he wouldn't have to worry about what was going on, but he said "If something happens, I'll be the first person arrested. And then they're not going to let me out. They're not going to care that I worked for the government for 40 years. They're not going to care that I've been here for that long." And I understand his hesitation and concern, so I can't really push him to do anything different. It's a really valid worry. In this day and time. 

So Richard and I went driving to the courthouse, and there were probably about 30 people or so, gathered around all talking about why the Confederate statues should be removed. And there were a couple of people standing in front of the Confederate statue, with their own protest signs. Honestly, we were a little bit confused as to whether or not those two people were with the other group, but I guess they were just holding the line so that the pro Confederates didn't. All swarm to the statue. Everything looked peaceful. When we were there. There were some good old boys across the street watching everything go down and a few police officers standing with them. But I was later told that things escalated in the afternoon. I guess a bunch of pro Confederate people showed up with their semi automatic weapons, and we're bullying and intimidating the protesters. One woman shoved one of the protesters out into the street. And the protesters slowly but surely all left because they were afraid the situation was going to escalate. I asked if those cops had done anything and I was told that the only thing that they did was come over to the protest and tell them to turn down their music because it was offensive. 

So we went back home, and had pizza for lunch and Richard took Oliver for a nap. I had told Penny that if she took a nap, then she could stay up late to watch the lunar eclipse. And frankly, it was obvious that she needed one because she was so tired that she had spent 70% of the morning crying. She had cried in the car on the way to go to the protest because she wanted to swim and she had cried in the car on the way home, because she wanted to stay up for the lunar eclipse but didn't think that she would be able to sleep. And then when we lay down in the bed, she cried for another 45 minutes while I laid next to her or held her. She was crying because she didn't think she was going to be able to nap and she really wanted to stay up for the lunar eclipse. And I kept telling her that she just needed to find a way to calm her body so that she could do some resting. Finally, she told me that she just couldn't stop crying and I told her to take some deep breaths. And just to try and relax her body. And after about five seconds, she was asleep. 

So that evening, we played some games all together with Richard while Oliver was running around the living room, and we played a uno match that legitimately lasted about an hour. After that, we started on dinner and watched. Most of trolls World Tour. After we ate, we got them all suited up and we went outside to swim and watch the fireworks. There were about four different locations around us that were shooting them off. A lot of them had the really big fireworks, but there were just big breaks in between when we saw them. Oliver was simultaneously scared of the sound and interested in the visuals. We spent about an hour to an hour and a half, swimming with the pool lights on while my dad sat in a chair on the deck and we watched the fireworks. 

Then we brought the kids in to rinse off and get ready for bed. And then went back outside to check for the lunar eclipse. But we couldn't see anything. So Richard started checking it on his phone and said, quote, oh, this would have been good to realize before and quote. Apparently it wasn't visible to the naked eye. So, comma, we didn't get to stay up to watch the lunar eclipse really, but we did get to stay up and watch the fireworks. 

Penny was so exhausted that she fell asleep before I ever even actually got into the bed. And then she slept a little bit late. The next morning, she was in a pretty good mood today. Despite the Late Night, night. And she got to do a lot of board game playing with Grandpa throughout the day, we swim in the morning for a nice extended period of time until both of the kids, almost simultaneously had potty accidents and their swimsuits and we had to come inside. We were about to get inside anyway so it wasn't that big of a deal but I know Penny was really embarrassed and I tried to reassure her that she didn't have to be embarrassed, with her family, and that we understood that sometimes accidents happen. 

So we came inside and all took showers and had some play time and then lunch and Richard took all over for a nap. While Oliver was sleeping. Penny. Grandpa and I played some more board games, but I was also superduper exhausted. So eventually I told them that I was just going to lay down for a few minutes and ended up taking a 20 minute cat nap before Richard and Oliver were up. I was so tired that my whole body was shaking and I just couldn't stay awake. So I'm grateful to get the cat nap, but I do feel sad that I missed out on that extra time with my dad, on the day that we were leaving. 

When the kids got up, we fed them dinner, and let them watch the last 30 minutes of trolls World Tour with Grandpa, then they ran around and play while we finished packing and loaded up the car. Oliver wasn't really eating while we were watching the movie, but once the movie was over. He ate all of his food and wanted more. But there wasn't any more. So I told him "Hey, it's time for us to go, but I can feed you some snacks in the car" and he just started full on sobbing. It was just the saddest cry, I have ever seen. And I picked him up and I held him and I thought that I was going to cry, and my dad patted him on the back and he looked like he was going to cry and then he disappeared into another room. 

I finally got Oliver to mostly Calm down, but he pretty much had crying fits on and off for the next 30 minutes while we finished loading up the car, said goodbye to my dad and he said that he loved I told him "We will see you soon," and he said "I hope so" which really kind of fueled my anxiety. He told me not to worry about spreading out our visits so that Brandon could come out because Brandon wasn't making any active plans to be out there, and that our, our schedule would get more complicated once Penny's school started. So we're going to go ahead and try to plan another trip to go out there soon. We got in the car and all of her cried in the beginning but finally we kind of got everyone to calm down and had a pretty good drive home. 

Penny was sad and had some tears and I was sad and had some tears too. We saw a rainbow on the drive. And they read books and play with their toys and had snacks, when we got home they were excited to run around and play with everything. It looked like it rained quite a bit and I had to go out to the hydroponic totes and empty out some of the water so the air roots didn't die. Then I did some light watering of the plants that were almost empty. And now I've been sitting up transcribing this journal entry for the last 20 minutes, so that I can go to sleep and start the week fresh. 

I am tired. I am tired from not sleeping but I'm also just tired of the general populace. They continue to spread their hate and their lies and refuse to wear a mask and pretend like race isn't real. And it's just exhausting. I really need to get off of Facebook, somehow, because I feel like I'm just drowning in a sea of hate and ignorance, all the time. I thought that this weekend would be a good break from it but I found myself checking into the protests that were happening here in Coppell on Friday and the protests that were happening in Weatherford on Saturday so frequently that I spent a lot of time on my phone anyways, like way too much time. But I just couldn't get my head out of it. 

The protests and Coppell seemed like it went pretty well. They had a good turnout and they shut down the main road for it, which I think really made an impression. But people yelled rude things, and everybody in Coppell was complaining about this or that and just acting like it was such a big inconvenience. It's just amazing to me how many people exist in both towns that think that there is no issue here to fight for. 

Anyway, I don't remember if I told you that the schools announced that there would both be distance learning and in person, learning for the fall and parents are required to make their decision on which one they will be doing by July 20. I should just be relieved that we have the option to do distance learning and I don't have to worry about Penny going in, but she was never going in anyway. 

Instead I'm just constantly infuriated by the selfish small minded people who are posting about how they just can't have their child miss their senior year, or they have to send them back because they miss their friends, people keep saying " we can't keep doing this ". And that just fuels the fire for me. First of all, if our governor or President had any balls then we wouldn't have to keep doing this because we would have already made such progress at this point, that basically the first half of the quarantine didn't even exist because everyone was acting like an ass. So we're starting over. But everybody has mental fatigue and nobody wants to keep doing it. COVID isn't not here just because you're tired of quarantining. And it's not true that we quote can't keep doing this and quote because we can if we have the support of our government, and we need to, because this has to really hit a wall and start going down soon. 

We're about to hit 3 million cases in the United States and we've already had over 130,000 deaths. When you look at those numbers and you still find yourself saying we can't keep doing this I just wonder where your head's at like you need to keep doing whatever you need to keep doing to keep your family safe. And what we really need is some leadership and our government to step in and say hey I'm going to take care of you while you do the thing that you need to do. 

Oh, I totally forgot to mention that Kanye West is running for president now let that soak in. I'm off to bed